People were made by God for connection, and this connection was meant to
begin in the earliest stages of our lives. I love to see young parents excited
about their children, and how enjoyable it is to see them playing and
interacting with their small children. Research has shown that isolation is
more damaging to an infant than early mistreatment. Isolation hinders the baby’s neurological
brain circuity from fully developing which will eventually show up in the
child’s ability to concentrate and to control his or her emotions. For example,
a baby that is ignored for hours on end in a neglectful home such as an
understaffed orphanage will eventually stop crying. The emotions of this little
infant just shut down. What we all need and desire is to be loved, accepted and
connected all through life.[i]
When we had to leave one of our sons at a daycare when he was about two,
we were apprehensive as to how he would do. His first day, he cried his eyes
out. The second day we took him, we were expecting the same scene. However, to
our surprise when we reached the gate, he looked around and spotted the person
he was looking for and took off. I stood there for a moment and watched as
parents brought their children and most of the kids were running to the same
person. She was a plump little lady who was hugging and squeezing the kids.
What was it that made the kids run to her? I noticed other workers all by
themselves with no kids running to them. Over the course of the year it wasn’t
hard to figure out why the kids took to this lady. She had something to give.
She had a certain grace about her that made it so easy to connect to every
child in the daycare.
Gratitude needs a good memory because without it, it withers away. We
need to remember where we came from and the pit we all had fallen into—a pit so
deep we could not crawl out by ourselves.
Forgetfulness erases the memory of what God has done for us. It’s like a
spiritual amnesia that distorts the past and misrepresents the future, and
worst of all it changes us, and not for the better. We forget where we came
from, who we are, and where we are going.
Gratitude helps us remember that God forgives our sins and blots them out
forever—never to be remembered against us. It reminds us that God heals our
bodies and our spirits with his healing balm of forgiveness. When he forgives
our sins, we experience healing, and when we forgive others, we experience
healing and so do they.
Gratitude recognizes the beautiful work of redemption. It helps us look
back and see his divine providence in the when, where, and how he saved us. It
was never just happenstance. He was there all along orchestrating all the
events, and as soon as we said yes, he embraced us with his grace. When we
experienced his love, we were overwhelmed because he is so powerful and yet so
accessible.
Gratitude realizes that his mercy comes to us in so many ways. When we are weak, he gives us strength.
When we are lost, he guides us. When we are confused, he gives us light.
When we are disheartened, he gives us comfort. He is gracious to us when we
fail, and his love is always abounding. We have never been treated as we
deserve, but as sons and daughters who have been given heavenly places we did
not earn.
[i]
Karyn Purvis, David Cross, & Wendy L.Sunshine, The Connected Child, New York: McGraw Hill, 2007, p. 26.
